11 November 2013

Want some moolah for your sky rocket? (Money for your pocket): Cockney Cash Machines

There is something intoxicating about London's East End - and I'm not just talking about the Gin Palaces. In between the living developing history, the family run pie, mash & liquor shops and barrow boy markets, there is a clear vibrancy and tradition to the area.
 
If you're lucky, you end up on a train or in a caff cafe (there is definitely no circumflexing in the East End) with a group of proper Cockney gals and geezers, getting to listen to their musical, melodical and almost nonsensical accent and phrases.
 
Well, if you luck out, don't worry as there is a rather practical solution.  
 
 (Excuse the wobbly pics, as I'm sure you can imagine catching these were a challenge...)
 
For someone to be knees-up Cockney London Geezer, you have to be born within the sound of Bow Bells. They have a language all of their own with their Cockney patois; a way of describing items with a collection of non-related words and rhyming slang. Take a Curry for instance. In Cockney slang it's called a "Ruby Murray". Go on, say it out loud with me "Ruby Murray - Curry" The slang was so successful as a unbreakable code, it allegedly used during WW2 to confuse the enemy intelligence as to the uninitiated it's intelligible.

 
I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw on Twitter via my blogger friend Selena the fact that there are cash machines in the East End with a Cockney Language option.

Oh yes, you read that correctly.
 
Selections available are:
- English
- Cockney
 
 ('scuse the poor quality pics, it was raining, the machine is a public one and we had to get them quickly. Admist much giggling.)

This little fella provided some fantastic entertainment on a rainy East End Saturday...

I swear I haven't lost my mind - even Mr Kiwi thought it was ace. It was initially thought of in 2007 by 'The Bank Company' who own the machines as a humourous draw. They ran with it for 3 months, only to re-instate it for the Olympics.
 
 
So the million dollar question is how do you find these machine the next time your wallet is empty? There seems to be a few (up to a possible 16) according to my research, but (at the time of writing) this one was found by turning right out of the second exit of Aldgate East tube, a short trot along Commercial Street and it's outside an Estate Agents.

Simply another mad reason why I love London. Fancy trying a few geeza?

Adam and Eve – believe ( would you Adam and Eve it?)
Barnet (Fair) – hair (commonly used without the rhyming of fair)
Ruby Murray – curry (I’m going d’ahn Brick Lane tonight for a ruby- can be said with or without murray)
Vincent Van Gogh – let’s be off (do you wanna do a Vincent?)
Trouble and Strife – wife (I’m in trouble with the old trouble and strife)
Lemon and Lime – time (what’s the lemon?)
Butcher’s Hook – look (let’s have a butchers)
Anneka Rice – advice (if you want some Anneka Rice)
Boat Race – face (she’s got a nice boat)
David Blaine – insane (you must be David Blaine)
Babe Ruth – truth (to tell you the babe)
Mexican Wave – shave (you need a Mexican)
 

18 comments :

  1. The first I had heard of this was "apples and pears" for stairs haha. So funny!

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    1. It's a crazy, crazy world in East London.

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  2. What in the world?!?! This is hysterical!! I had heard someone mention that the Cockney accent was different, but I had no idea they had a separate languages as well! Oh, and that ATM machine cracked me up. It's things like this that really make me love London!

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    1. I know, right! I loved that you have an option English OR Cockney, like it's a language all of it's own.
      We couldn't resist photographing & blogging it even though the photos are pretty grim!

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  3. THIS IS THE BEST THING EVER. I just read all of these out to my flat mates and we can't believe it.

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    1. We actually didn't believe it ourselves. It was such a great pep to an otherwise rainy grey day.

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  4. The cash machines have a language option for Cockney - cool!
    When I was in Rome, I saw an offer for a sandwhich named Brad Pitt - With my bit of Cockney, soo weird :)

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  5. Oh I heard of this ages ago and forgot all about it. Looks like a lot of fun and think I'll need to hunt an ATM down! I love the little cockney run down at the bottom of the post- some of them I knew, but there were a few I use and didn't know they were cockney (butchers and barnet)!

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    1. Yes, definitely - it'll put a twinkle in your mincer.
      Oh, really? That's awesome - there are loads I've never heard (and a few I suspect I have heard but they are made up...)

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  6. I've heard about this, but not actually seen any.

    They're brilliant.

    Hmm maybe...

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    1. They're just one of those hilarious things...

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  7. I've had this explained to me before, but I swear if you didn't grow up with it, you'd never be able to pick Cockney up. Not for my feeble mind anyways. It's completely blown away by this.

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    1. No, and to add to is, they make new ones up two. It is surprising how many have snuck into everyday chatter in the UK though - such as 'Let's have a butchers' It's a butchers hook, so you want a look.
      You won't need to know these, I swear.

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  8. That is so funny! I've worked with two Cockney people before and they're hilarious. Love their silly rhymes and even their naughty ones!

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    1. I love the really, really naughty ones, and take a particular delight in them :D So mature!

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