Want some moolah for your sky rocket? (Money for your pocket): Cockney Cash Machines

There is something intoxicating about London’s East End – and I’m not just talking about the Gin Palaces. In between the living developing history, the family run pie, mash & liquor shops and barrow boy markets, there is a clear vibrancy and tradition to the area.


If you’re lucky, you end up on a train or in a caff cafe (there is definitely no circumflexing in the East End) with a group of proper Cockney gals and geezers, getting to listen to their musical, melodical and almost nonsensical accent and phrases.


Well, if you luck out, don’t worry as there is a rather practical solution.  


 (Excuse the wobbly pics, as I’m sure you can imagine catching these were a challenge…)

For someone to be knees-up Cockney London Geezer, you have to be born within the sound of Bow Bells. They have a language all of their own with their Cockney patois; a way of describing items with a collection of non-related words and rhyming slang. Take a Curry for instance. In Cockney slang it’s called a “Ruby Murray”. Go on, say it out loud with me “Ruby Murray – Curry” The slang was so successful as a unbreakable code, it allegedly used during WW2 to confuse the enemy intelligence as to the uninitiated it’s intelligible.


I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw on Twitter via my blogger friend Selena the fact that there are cash machines in the East End with a Cockney Language option.

Oh yes, you read that correctly.


Selections available are:

– English

– Cockney


 (‘scuse the poor quality pics, it was raining, the machine is a public one and we had to get them quickly. Admist much giggling.)

This little fella provided some fantastic entertainment on a rainy East End Saturday…

I swear I haven’t lost my mind – even Mr Kiwi thought it was ace. It was initially thought of in 2007 by ‘The Bank Company’ who own the machines as a humourous draw. They ran with it for 3 months, only to re-instate it for the Olympics.



So the million dollar question is how do you find these machine the next time your wallet is empty? There seems to be a few (up to a possible 16) according to my research, but (at the time of writing) this one was found by turning right out of the second exit of Aldgate East tube, a short trot along Commercial Street and it’s outside an Estate Agents.

Simply another mad reason why I love London. Fancy trying a few geeza?

Adam and Eve – believe ( would you Adam and Eve it?)
Barnet (Fair) – hair (commonly used without the rhyming of fair)
Ruby Murray – curry (I’m going d’ahn Brick Lane tonight for a ruby- can be said with or without murray)
Vincent Van Gogh – let’s be off (do you wanna do a Vincent?)
Trouble and Strife – wife (I’m in trouble with the old trouble and strife)
Lemon and Lime – time (what’s the lemon?)
Butcher’s Hook – look (let’s have a butchers)
Anneka Rice – advice (if you want some Anneka Rice)
Boat Race – face (she’s got a nice boat)
David Blaine – insane (you must be David Blaine)
Babe Ruth – truth (to tell you the babe)
Mexican Wave – shave (you need a Mexican)


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