I like to consider myself the queen of small talk. I can chat the hind leg off a donkey (example: I once spent 9 hours brunching with the same two ladies, in the same restaurant on the same day) and don’t often find myself with absolutely nothing to say (*launches into random story only tangentially related to original topic*) but when I saw these travel edition ‘would you rather’ questions, I was actually quite stumped.
My Nana who used to call me giggling Gertie would have been shocked. Like, surprised enough to let me into her lounge (apparently I used to accidentally smash all of her ornaments, so I got banned to the garden when we visited her. True story.)
Consider this the travel version of Snog Marry Avoid, I am so whipping these questions out at my next dinner party. You have been warned friends!
So. Would you rather…?
– Travel or focus on your career at the age of 25?
I kinda did both – moving from New Zealand to London to become an expat when I was 20 was both a travel choice and a career choice – and it was the best decision I ever made. It changed my life on practically every level well, apart from the telling bad jokes, that’s something that will never entirely leave me I don’t think.
– Never take the train or never take an aeroplane again?
Ooooooh. This is hard. I think possible never taking an aeroplane would be harder as you can drive pretty well anywhere that you can catch a train to. That’s a win for logic, right?
– Stay in a palm hut along the seashore for seven days or stay in a log cabin in the woods for one month?
I loathe sand though adore the ocean, so this one had me a little stumped. Eventually, the image of a Canadian cabin in the woods, the forest floor redolent with pine needles, a valley ringed with mountain peaks and the crackle of a cosy fireplace lured me in. As long as there was wifi…
– Be left behind in the bush on an African safari or be left behind in the water on a scuba trip?
Left behind on a safari, because all I’d have to do is play the Lion King soundtrack, and I’d be accepted into the local Lion Pride as an odd but valued member of the clan.
– Have an awesome job in a mediocre city or a mediocre job in an awesome city?
I’ve done both of these as well, and I’d definitely say awesome job in a mediocre city: life is what you make it, and if you’re stuck in a horrible job nothing, and I mean nothing, is good in your life. We spend so much of our lives at work that it can’t be horrific – that state of being steals away at your soul. Now I’m so happy to say that I’ve got an awesome job in an awesome city – long may it continue!
– Be able to teleport to places you’ve already been or only be able to teleport to places you’ve never been before?
Jeez, talk about tough questions. The ability to teleport home to New Zealand instead of 26-hours of flyi… Oh. Wait. No. Now, that would be the dream (oh, and you could always teleport to the places you’ve been that are near to the places that you’ve never been eg. teleport to Singapore and then catch a flight to Vietnam…. ) so it’d have to be the former.
– Be stuck on a seven-hour delay, or turn up at the airport and realise your flight is tomorrow?
I’d have to pick box number two – at least I could go home/book a hotel/plan more fun. I’ve had many 5-hour stopovers in boring airports, and trust me, there are only so many times you can look at the stock of airport hotels without going stir crazy.
– Be able to play every musical instrument that you touch or speak every language that you hear?
Speak every language that I hear, hands down. I’m always so embarrassed to travel to new countries where at best I can say hello, please, thank you and I’m from New Zealand, and then they sweetly apologise for not speaking English. Also, there are incredible people who already play all of the instrument so well, and I can stream their music to my devices in an instant, so why
– Would you rather travel along the ocean floor or take a trip to outer space?
Very real sharks vs. potential aliens. I know which one I’d rather face. That, and seeing the earth from outer space would be truly magical.
– Travel back in time to meet your ancestors or forward to meet your descendants?
I’ve got some really interesting characters in my family tree, including illegitimate English royalty and Jamaican blood, so I’d love to meet them and experience their world. Can you imagine how incredible (and possibly smelly) going back to a time where everything is so different would be?
– Have in-flight WiFi but no legroom (like, zero inches) or in-flight legroom but no WiFi?
LEGROOM. I adore having no wifi in the clouds – it’s the perfect time to watch movies, snooze, write blog posts and catch up on my reading. The ability to stretch me legs, however, is worth its weight in gold.
– Be able to eat anything and any quantity of food with no negative health effects or be refreshed and well rested after only three hours of sleep?
I’d rather be well rested after three hours of sleep – imagine how much more Outlander I could watch if I didn’t need eight solid hours of shuteye a night!
Die happy in five years or die unhappy in sixty years?
Obviously, the answer to this is a resounding ‘neither’ but I’ve made it my life’s goal to treasure as many moments as possible, so I guess I’d reluctantly have to say five years. YOLO and all that 90s catchphrase jazz!